For Recreational Use Only! Results May Vary!

HELLO GENTLE READERS,

I really enjoy useless information so, how about a freakishly funny, fantasticly far-fetched, fascinating, funky, far-out feast of fertilizer? As you can see, I also enjoy illiteration.

1. The expression "three-dog night" comes from when it's so cold you need to sleep with three dogs to keep warm ( I admit I've slept with "dogs" before but never in a menage-a-trois).
2. You're more apt to be a target of mosquitos if you eat bananas. You may also become the target of monkeys, I imagine.
3. Tigers have striped skin as well as striped fur. I guess that's why you never see a tiger on "L.A. Ink".
4. White eggs come from chickens with white feathers. Brown eggs come from chickens with brown feathers. Easter eggs come from chickens that have been on "L.A. Ink". OK, OK, I made up the Easter egg factoid.
5. Did you know that a "jiffy" is an actual unit of time? It is from 1/50th to 1/100th of a second. It's also a pretty good peanut butter if you can catch it.
6. There are more insects in one square mile of rural land than there are human beings on earth. The meek may inherit the earth but, they'll have to wrestle it away from the bugs.
7. French Fries, Swiss Steak, Chop Suey and Russian Dressing are all American in origin. I wonder if "American Cheese" is Japanese?
8. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" may be the toughest tongue twister in the English language. Being a hillbilly, I even had trouble typing it.
9. Forty percent of the people who attend a party at your house will snoop through your medicine cabinet. A solution to this may be to invite only sixty percent of the people you normally would invite.
10. Cats are now in more households than dogs. They're in more trees than dogs too.

Please feel free to add to this list or ridicule any of the entries.

Tom Vickers